stress and sweets

I am tired. No, I'm not overworked. But I am definitely exhausted from the stress of always having to defend my personal opinions. There is no fun in always, always feeling belittled simply because I interpret the Bible in a different way. At least my mind no longer feels as though it's going to explode due to being overworked as I seek to use words. Down side is that my back is feeling the pain, especially since I put all my stress in the small of my back.

I am angry, frustrated, irritated, etc. I want to focus on the good that God does in the world, and I most definitely do not enjoy focusing on the law (the stereotypical rules) verses the gospel (hey folks, Jesus died for everyone, not just heterosexuals!) in the Bible. I want all of us to get along, but I know that is not always the case. However, I do expect respect from all sides. Nothing is worse in my opinion (besides lying and hypocrisy) than the unwillingness to listen to others.

Sadly enough, I am not finding my usual comfort in baking for others. Yes, I made some awesome apple crisp and puppy chow for a meeting tonight. But baking didn't work like it usually does. Usually the preparation and cleanup helps me to relax. I like to bake for others. I like to wash dishes. There is just something comforting about this routine. So simple and effective. Maybe I should make some more bread from scratch just so I can take out my emotions while pounding or kneading the poor, defenseless bread dough. Cause that was fun the other day (Saturday, when I was up and moving at 4:30 in the morning to take someone to the doctor then stayed up to bake bread).

Here's to hoping that crocheting will provide a mindnumbing and calming effect.

Or the fact that I will be joining a college community band since, being the band geek that I am, I miss band.

Or the fact that within the next few weeks I will be hanging out with old friends and family.

Oh, and prayer will be essential. Mine and that of others.