chaos as a lifestyle

one of the best sayings: when it rains, it pours.

completely appropriate as i sit here watching it rain (again). never seems to stop
[at least it's better than the snow i saw falling last night]

but it is also appropriate since that saying describes life.

my first semester was nowhere near as busy as this one. yes, i was constantly doing coursework, but i was not traveling anywhere near as much as i have been in the last month or so.

april was crazy: preached the first sunday, spent five days driving around and interviewing the following weekend, went to and helped out with my cousin's wedding the next weekend (and battled several inches of snow), and went home for easter break.

so here's a more detail of the downpour i've been experiencing:

the wedding was awesome. my first wedding to lead, and it was a learning experience. my sisters used my camcorder to get the whole service, although i'm never on the screen since i was hiding behind the trellis and pillars and flowers. it was a good, fun, relaxing and utterly enjoyable time with family.
and the snow was fun but not. made everything look pretty since the world was not quite green yet, but horrible on country roads that were not plowed. so it tore up the undercarriage/skid plate on my car.

i got back to st paul sunday evening. at 7, i met with a group to work on our presentation that would take place the next morning.
[and we totally rocked the presentation skit!]

finally got back to my apartment around 9:30 pm.

up early monday morning for class.

and worked on a bible study for my book of revelation class.

then the next day i packed, attended class and drove back with a sem colleague to south dakota through the rain.
arrived in parkston at 10:30 and was told i looked exhausted. cause i was.

note: i spent less than 48 hours in st paul before taking off for almost a week

then on wednesday, when i wanted to sleep in, i was not really able to. i had a big essay to write. then that afternoon was spent easter dress shopping for the neighbor girl.
so we drove up to mitchell where we met mom to go shopping.
and forgot mom's car in mitchell.

so thursday was a trip to mitchell.
otherwise very low-key and included much needed rest and maundy thursday service at salem in parkston

friday was getting my car prepped and ready to go
[dad fixed the skid plate on my car]
and then the drive to omaha to hang with kayla, where we went shopping and ate food and had some bonding time.
we went to good friday services at a local congregation where we were overdressed (we wore dress clothes...who knew that jeans were acceptable?)

saturday involved being lazy, visiting kayla at work, and renting "hereafter" staring matt damon

sunday was church in the morning. we both wore skirts, but it was borderline too cold to wear anything but pants.
then we loaded my car and i took off to spend the rest of the day in parkston.
spent the afternoon and evening with mom, dad, ki, colten, grandparents and neighbors.

monday i tried to sleep in (unfortunately i had a problem the entire week with waking up no later than 8 am) and slowly got ready to drive back to st paul.

and i'm not going anywhere for a few days. my next trip is to the black hills for sister bonding time with kayla and kendra may 6.
this friday, i'm spending time with friend(s) here in the twin cities.
this sunday, i preach at salem english in minneapolis.
i have class, but not much homeworkwise until may 10, which is when i as a graduating senior really need to buckle down and work on final papers [ideally i will be working earlier]
my last final is due may 15, which is mere weeks away...

and in the midst of this, i'm working with first call stuff. talking to a congregation that is interested in calling me and [hopefully] setting up ordination and installation for this summer

forecast for the next month: torrential downpours

fortunately i prefer downpour to the annoying, never-ending mists

2011

hard to believe that this is a new year. my year started off on somewhat the wrong foot with a very interesting (in the midwestern sense of the word) beginning.

as i posted on facebook, i had a very interesting first two days of the new year.

jan 1 (around midnight, so it might have been jan 2) - got peed on by a sleeping toddler. not cool. will be funny someday, but still not cool yet.

jan 2 - driving to sioux falls for approval interview when i was rear-ended...and still made it to my interview on time

jan 3 - drove to mitchell (and past the scene of the crime) to deliver a shovel to some boys who were snowed in but didn't have one...

jan 4 - only time i left the house was to go take the dog for a walk. and it was glorious outside! (if i can find the sd card adapter for my micro-sd, i'll post pics of the snowy fields)

jan 5 - a sister turned 24 (marks the last birthday of my immediate family until may). went to church office with my mom so she could chat with the pastor and another bible study leader about their upcoming bible studies for their respective women's circles

jan 6 (today!) - decided it was time to pull out old computers and deal with copying music and pics onto my hard drive

additional notes:

- car accident: i'm fine. haven't noticed any pain or whiplash (well, my wrist was sore for about 2 days, but fine now). car still runs and drives, even though the bumper is busted and the alignment is a bit off...i got off easy compared to the person who hit me, whose front end did not look pretty and whose face hurt from the air bag deployment

- approval interview: for candidacy in the elca, i had to go through the final step toward ordination which consisted of an interview (panel of 2 in my case) who recommend me for approval and was voted on by the entire committee the next day...now i'm free to be ordained!

- bible study prep: i like how the pastor meets with the leaders so that they can bounce ideas off each other and ask questions before they lead...i think i shall remember this when i have my own congregation...which i hope to have next summer now that i've been cleared for ordination...

- computers: pulling out the old computers...which are dinosaurs and do everything in slow motion...
this means that they took waaaaay longer to start up, and using them requires patience...
this means that i could check my email and download 6 gb of data off flashdrives to my new computer before the old one even booted up...
this means i'm going to take all day to get the old pics and music off my old computers...

big news

why is it that life seems to either be rushing by or moving slower than a snail?

the beginning of this week seemed like it would never end. five days of school and classes this week with a major project to be completed as well as three different papers.

but then next week is thanksgiving break. five days off from school. although i will be spending some of those days working on essays or paperwork.

the first three days crawled by. then today happened. and time sped up.

time really does fly when you have fun.

i found out this morning that the faculty has approved me to continue on my merry way towards ordination. this means that i only have to impress the candidacy committee. wish me luck in early january!

but i also had a bittersweet time with my preaching/worship lab. this was our last time together. our lab is over and done for the rest of the semester. we had a good time but it's sad to let that fun end. of course, we still have class for another month. but it's not the same knowing we won't be spending two hours a week as a small group.

and the other excitement is the new harry potter film. i'm going to see it tonight with friends. we'll be traveling all the way to edina, which means that we will have an extra late night. but i'm super excited...and if i get around to it tomorrow in between classes and flying to virginia beach for a wedding, i'll post my thoughts. warning: i'm gonna love it. no matter what. i'm a harry potter fan and i know i'll love it.

i really should be packing for my trip. still have to decide on what to take with to wear to the wedding. have an idea, but still debating. and the sad thing when flying is that you have to pay to bring more than one option...so i need to solidify my decision and throw it in my bag. well, not throw. cause throwing leads to wrinkles. so fold or roll nicely.

that is all for now.

so much going on and i'm loving it!

crap

why is it that some days and weeks just seem to never end? and that there will always be stress and pain and waiting and frustration and exhaustion?

it's amazing to me that i'm still a generally optimistic person. of course, this is all by the grace of God.

so here's the latest rundown from my world over the last couple weeks:

after having fun in rapid city with krissa and libby (and by extension kendra and trevor), krissa and i traveled back to parkston. where we got her ready to move back to new york to start her third year at vassar. so we relaxed a bit and watched some movies, she spent some time with local friends, and we packed bags. we spent time with the pets. the household is now down to three pets since agent bill ticklemeister (bill for short) returned to new york to be the resident bunny. but it's still interesting to have two cats and a hyperactive dog.

last wednesday, krissa and i drove over to sioux falls. we met up with our cousin nick to enjoy a late meal before we all had to get to bed since we had an early morning. krissa and i spent the night in a hotel since we had to be at the airport around 5 am for our 6:15 flight. we then flew to newburgh, new york where mom and kayla (who had started driving the day before) picked us up before finishing the trip to poughkeepsie and vassar college.

we were there for a few days before mom, kayla and i took off to start driving home. kayla had to work on monday, so we were back in omaha by sunday evening. of course, we stopped at an outlet mall on the way...

then mom and i drove to sioux falls where we picked up a car from the airport parking lot, went back to parkston. on the way i stopped by to pick up my new glasses, which do not have nosepieces on them (oh, how i hate those stupid little rubber pieces).

that night i answered a phone call. my uncle clete informed me that grandma mabel (my paternal grandma who is 92 years old) was not doing so hot and was going to be eventually taken to the hospital in mitchell. so on tuesday, the day she went up and had surgery to remove some scar tissue, mom and i showed up briefly at the hospital. we also blipped out to eat two suppers. one with my dad and one with my sister kiana's boyfriend colten, whom i had never met until the other day. she was doing quite well. was a bit hard to understand when talking, but we figured that was because she didn't have her teeth in and because she was on morphine.

then yesterday i spent all day finishing up my approval essay. for those of you who are not aware of the process to be ordained in the evangelical lutheran church in america, we have something fun called candidacy. and candidacy requires that we have to put together a final essay that is 17-20 pages long with four parts to it. so i finished it up with the total of 19 pages. it was quite an ordeal to make it sound intelligent and coherent and worthy of a pastor...but it's done and turned in

and today, which i had been hoping to consider the official start of my vacation, began with printing off some paperwork to send in. and to hope that i'm completely done with internship now that everything has been turned in.

it continued with putting together a care package for krissa. techinically, mom did all the prep. i just helped remember to put in the sunglasses that got left behind.

then i was on my way to mitchell (again). this time to meet mom where she was dropping off the car that colten would be borrowing in order to go visit kiana, taking along the new license plates for her bubble. cause that's how we refer to her new car. it looks like a bubble. so it's the bubble.

then mom and i made a brief stop by shopko to kill some time before going back to the hospital. where we sat for a couple hours before going to meet dad and colten for their respective supper breaks. ate with dad. and dropped off something we forget to give to colten earlier for the trip.

in the midst off all this running around, mom is talking to krissa about the challenges she is facing. she is trying to figure out just how much of a course load she can handle while still trying to regain strength and go to rehab. so that is just another level adding to our stress. we have a lot on our plate right now.

then we returned to the hospital. when we got to grandma's room, two of my aunts were standing in the hallway starting to call all the siblings to let them know that grandma was being transferred down to icu. which is not a very good sign. so mom and i stuck around for longer than we originally intended to see if she would stabilize.

and so the waiting game is beginning. we don't know if she'll make it through the night or past the weekend. or she may pull through and live for quite a bit longer. but we get to wait and see.

i hate just sitting around waiting to find out what needs to be done. i hate hospitals. i hate not knowing whether or not my plans for the weekend or next are going to have to change.

some vacation...

the pics from the north...aka canada

so i know that i did not post many (or any) pics from my last few days up in bemidji.

i went to winnipeg with my roommie from freshman year at augustana college. we headed north and crossed at baudette, drove through ontario around the lake of the woods before heading west to manitoba and winnipeg. very scenic indeed.

once in winnipeg, we had a great experience of showing up at the hostel we wanted only to find out that they were overbooked. but the owner was really nice and even gave us 30 bucks (yup, canadians refer to their dollars as bucks just like in the usa) for our hassle before directing us to the other hostel in town.

so we arrived there, got two beds in a dorm room (oh, how i love bunk beds). no one else showed up to fill the other 4 beds, so we basically had a private room.

we walked outside a bit before ducking into a store called warehouse one (or something like that), where i found a pair of sunglasses on clearance for 2.50. which in us dollars would be roughly 2.40. good deal. and super cute.

since it was downpouring out, we ventured up into the skywalk. i guess winnipeg, with its cold winters, decided to build a skywalk that connects several buildings, two of which are malls. so we had fun shopping around and buying souvenirs.

we also made it to forks market, a really cute mall that sits along the muddy Red River (the same river that likes to flood fargo/morehead and grand forks).

we went back to the hostel, where i did some work. no rest for those who were not really on vacation. mariko went out and meandered (even got a bit lost) through downtown.

the next morning, we rose and went to find a statue of winnie the pooh. since winnie was named after winnipeg...but no real luck. the sculptor had some cool statues in the sculpture garden.

then we trekked it back taking the short route

Pictures!!!!!!!

As promised (now that I broke down and bought an SD card reader since my laptop's built-in one decided to stop working last week), here are some pictures:

Bethel Lutheran with Roddy at TeenServe

Crew #58 with Melissa and Granny

Alpine Coaster in Duluth, MN

Carley and I in a paddleboat on a lake in WI

From my old to my new living room...

Mount Carmel 

Sunset on Lake Carlos

Sunrise on July 13

Sunrise on July 16

Most intense slip n slide

My gruesome bug bite (it looked worse in person)

A beaver in Bemidji

mid-july update

wow. it has been a crazy last couple weeks.

here is one word to describe my life since my last posting: rollercoaster.

i'm not usually one for metaphors, but i really appreciate a good one. every once in a long while.

so, here's the gist:

i last posted on monday, july 5. which is when i went from spending time with family (nice top portion) back to my house in bemidji (major drop). where i started to pack since i would be moving that friday.

during the course of the next three days (kinda steady and level), i went to work, lead a Bible study, packed up stuff in the house, and so on and so forth...

thursday night was able to have a "picnic" (in quotation marks because we ate burger king) in the park with two ladies from church (going up again).

then the whirlwind really began on friday (think spiraling down). i spent all day packing with a few breaks for when i grew tired. but it was nice that from the time the kindem family showed up with their pick-up and to the last time i drove from the house in my car, it was only 2.5 hrs. amazing how quickly you can move, especially when you get help from some in the congregation.

good/bad point: one dreyer boy pointed out that you can tell who in the congregation likes me because you can always tell by looking at those who help you move.

just so everyone knows, only two families were willing/able. so my response was that no one wanted to admit that i was moving because they love me so much.

so there i was in a new place, and i started unpacking a few things. like my dress clothes to prevent major wrinkles. and some kitchen stuff (food and utensils).

then i woke up and packed for a week of camp.

then i dropped off my car at the local mechanic to have them look at something that went wrong.

then was picked up to leave for a week of camp (upward again).

camp was nice (stayed pretty level). was at mount carmel near alexandria, mn. highlights include:
- meeting a fellow intern (who is originally from arizona, went to sem in phoenix, az and berkeley, ca, and is working in wisconsin)
- starting the week off with a tornado warning in the middle of the first supper of the week...also a low point since it was 45 min of being cooped up (silly storm traveled 10 mph)
- meeting miriam's family
- spending time getting to know other campers and staff
- relaxing (lots of naps involved)
- reading
- watching sunrises (that's right, folks - more than one early morning for the girl who hates being up before 8!)
- seeing former interns and their new baby (well, she was born in november, so not "new" per se)

then arrived back in bemidji, picked up my car, and went back to my new place in order to organize a bit more. right now, most of the organization is trying to separate what is mine versus borrowed, and locating items that simply got shoved into boxes/bags while leaving in a hurry. i did not take enough time packing before friday, it seems...

sad fact in my life is that while on the way back from camp, i felt a tickle in my throat. assumed it was simply dehydration. alas, it was more. cause i had a full-blown sore throat the next day. fortunately i didnt have to talk to anyone until later in the evening. helped out with a rejoice and remember service hosted by my church as a way to rejoice and remember cancer patients (current and past). ended with some pie eating.

sunday morning, realized that my throat was not 100% but was at least improved. until i had a coughing spasm in the middle of pastor mark's sermon. fellowship involved eating more pie.

and now, today.

which is truly a manic monday.

cause i woke up to find a huge, swollen, red, warm-to-the-touch bug bite on my forearm. yesterday it was a mere, itchy mosquito bite. or so i thought. but today, i'm thinking that it may be more along the lines of a spider bite...i've never had such an obnoxious bite before in my life!

it was so obnoxious, i even went to the clinic to have it checked out. yup, i went to a doctor. and for those of you who know me, i don't go to see doctors. even when i need shots or physicals, i end up with nurses or pa's.

so it turns out that you have to wait 48 hrs to find out if a bug bite is simply allergic reaction or something else. and considering i just took an allergy pill not long ago, and the bite just seems to be getting itchier, i'm thinking that i will have to fill the prescription for antibiotics. which i'm not really looking forward to doing. but if that will help my arm out, i'll take the first prescribed pills in my life.

if you don't believe that i've managed to get away without prescriptions in 25 years, talk to my mother. i may be wrong, but i'm not remembering a single time i've had my name on a little bottle...

then to top off my day, i just got a phone call to let me know that my cleaning was not up to snuff. so i'll be off this afternoon to go wipe down the oven, fridge and cabinets in the kitchen. pretty sure it won't be up to the standards that the landlords want, but i'll do my best. even with my bum arm.

the weather

i'm always amazed at how much my mood is affected by the weather. and how sometimes it's not.

today for example. it's raining out, which is kinda disappointing to me since i would prefer a bit of sun, which i got this morning when i first woke up ridiculously early before going back to sleep. and the next time i woke up (with my alarm going off, of course), it was raining. nothing really major, but enough to bring moisture to the very sandy soil that is oh so common up in these parts.

someone recently had finally explained to me why on earth they need so much rain around here. it's because they have very sandy/clay-y soil that doesn't hold any moisture. which is not really what i'm used to since i seem to have grown up in a part of the country where the soil can get saturated quickly thus leading to flash floods.

but back to the drizzle outside.

it's a calm rain. kinda pleasant to watch, but i'm definitely in thunderstorm mode. i want the torrential downpours that are over in minutes as the clouds pass and the sun comes back out. so much more interesting to have the extremes. there is something to walking in a downpour with the sun shining down on you.

but i'm noticing that despite the lingering rain, i'm in a pretty good mood. i spent all day yesterday, which just so happened to be memorial day, by myself at home. i curled up on the couch and watch tv shows. movies on tv and tv on dvd. it was a much needed break and down-time. i needed to be able to spend a day literally doing nothing and forgetting the world outside. of having my phones on but no one calling.

except my mother to double check on when kiana is going to come visit me so we (the two of us plus people from church) can traipse on down to the science museum in minneapolis where the dead sea scrolls are on display. which is less than two weeks away! yay!

on another note, i finally got around to planting the seeds to start my tomato and strawberry hanging pots. and i put all my plants out on the patio deck yesterday. where they will remain until there is a frost warning. i had been keeping them inside so i could shelter them a bit from the extremes of the outdoors. and because the soil was more likely to retain water inside while i was gone for four days. most of them are growing. not fast enough in my mind, but at least i'm seeing green amid the dark soil. and now they are lined up in hopes of getting the morning sun.