my final day at bethel

i preached and helped lead worship. then there was a potluck in my honor. it was the "we'll miss you" and "we wish you well" event

the pics from the north...aka canada

so i know that i did not post many (or any) pics from my last few days up in bemidji.

i went to winnipeg with my roommie from freshman year at augustana college. we headed north and crossed at baudette, drove through ontario around the lake of the woods before heading west to manitoba and winnipeg. very scenic indeed.

once in winnipeg, we had a great experience of showing up at the hostel we wanted only to find out that they were overbooked. but the owner was really nice and even gave us 30 bucks (yup, canadians refer to their dollars as bucks just like in the usa) for our hassle before directing us to the other hostel in town.

so we arrived there, got two beds in a dorm room (oh, how i love bunk beds). no one else showed up to fill the other 4 beds, so we basically had a private room.

we walked outside a bit before ducking into a store called warehouse one (or something like that), where i found a pair of sunglasses on clearance for 2.50. which in us dollars would be roughly 2.40. good deal. and super cute.

since it was downpouring out, we ventured up into the skywalk. i guess winnipeg, with its cold winters, decided to build a skywalk that connects several buildings, two of which are malls. so we had fun shopping around and buying souvenirs.

we also made it to forks market, a really cute mall that sits along the muddy Red River (the same river that likes to flood fargo/morehead and grand forks).

we went back to the hostel, where i did some work. no rest for those who were not really on vacation. mariko went out and meandered (even got a bit lost) through downtown.

the next morning, we rose and went to find a statue of winnie the pooh. since winnie was named after winnipeg...but no real luck. the sculptor had some cool statues in the sculpture garden.

then we trekked it back taking the short route

VBS and other craziness

So the final week for me at Bethel Lutheran Church is well underway...I spend about 12 hrs at church on Monday. Seriously. 12 hrs. 8:30-8:30. But it was good. Except that Monday always sets the tone for the rest of the week...

Started off the day with a quick email check. Exciting to be getting apartments and financial aid all lined up and ready to go for the coming school year. Not exciting that I can't move my stuff right away into my apartment. Instead I get to impose upon friends and family to store stuff for a few more weeks.

Then spent several hours in the church library. I organized (by this I mean sorted into genre) and shelved (required adjusting several shelves) books. I was getting pretty handy with the screwdriver to take out the screws/pegs that would hold up each shelf in order to adjust for height or to add/take out shelves from various sections. Super excited that I only have one cart left to sort. And it's by my desk already partially sorted. Which is awesome. Not gonna complete the dotting process (I sort with each genre having its own color). Looking back, I'm really sad that I did not take "Before" pictures...but there will be "After"

Then it was VBS prep time/set-up followed by 2.5 hrs with the kids. We had a pretty small gathering. 23 kids last night. Here are some pics I took with my camera phone (not all the best quality)

Sunday update

Special note: 100th post!

This past Sunday was a lot of fun. I noticed that I'm much more relaxed the last couple weeks. Partly because my committee submitted their eval, so I'm home free! And I no longer act or dress to please them (which I really didn't do). At least, I no longer feel the pressure to live up to ridiculous expectations. I can be me. The me that is the one called by God, not the me that they saw.

So I led worship. I had two acolytes but no assistant. And it was the traditional service where we always have assistants since their is a lot of chanting and various activities. So I was complemented for being able to handle everything myself. Which is actually how I prefer it. I don't really like the tag-teaming for worship. I find that it distracts more than anything. One person alone can permit better transitions...But that's just my opinion.

My sermon was not typed out but was the outline form. I had woken up Saturday morning with the complete sermon rolling through my head. I've missed that experience all year. So much pressure and stress had been preventing the easy flow of words that God gives me when I am able to simply exist.

Here is the outline: 

Let’s talk about faith and promises…

What is faith? What do we have faith in? Who do we have faith in? (belief/trust in family, friends, doctors, medicine, GOD)

What is a promise? Something to be fulfilled, we wait for it, not be forgotten, hoped for, etc

But what does all that really mean?

Hebrews 11:1 – Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen

Assurance of God’s promises – what are God’s promises? Love, care, healing, peace, salvation, etc. God is good and faithful

Conviction of what we do not see – bit of a challenge

My year…negative beliefs lead to only seeing to negative which leads to more negative beliefs…possibility of ending internship not because of conflict but the constant negativity – in the grips of Satan and felt like Job

God moment – at rock bottom, realized that things had to change and relied upon God to open my eyes to see the good

Belief and attitude affects our ability to see God’s blessings around us

Faith in what I was not seeing at that time, esp when I rely so much on my eyesight and instead learning to rely on God

It’s not “seeing is believing” but “believing is seeing”

Eyes can deceive – optical illusion, only see what we’re looking for

When belief guides our sight, our eyes are opened to previously ignored sights

Promises I see God working on fulfilling for me, you, Bethel, ELCA, worldwide churches:

·         God gives us strength (Phil 4:13, God brings you to it and sees you thru),

·         God cares for us (Matthew 6:25-34)

·         God has plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11-14a)

So remember, whenever you start not be so assured or convicted, hold fast to faith in God, in whom and through whom all things are possible.

Thanks be to God. Amen.

That afternoon was busy. And hot. But busy. Cause I went on a picnic with a few ladies from church at a nearby lake. About 10 miles or so from Bemidji. It was around 90 degrees out, which was basically as warm as it gets up here.

Then I went over to eat supper with some other parishioners, look at quilts and go to the county fair next door. Nothing quite like crashing two different county fairs in as many weeks...But highlights of were walking through the quilt building. Open class up here is quilting extravaganza. Here are some of my faves (note that I have no idea who did them...). FYI: Obama's face is composed of over 500 pieces of fabric...

nostalgia is settling in...

I cannot believe that I will be done in 10 days. Seriously, I only have 10 days left at Bethel Lutheran Church in Bemidji, MN. Today is the 5th of August and my last day is Sunday, August 15.

Where did the year go?

Not that I'm complaining that it's over. Not even close. I'm actually really excited for the next stage of my life. I'm ready to get away from this particular congregation with its conflict and miscommunication. I'm tired of the bickering and the constant fears and the ever-present negativity. I want to be somewhere where there is a sense of optimism and hope and goodness. Not a church where rumors are flying around the entire community that this congregation will be 1) not having VBS, 2) leaving the ELCA, or 3) closing. Among other rumors. But those are the three I have heard recently and know to be false. It's been a long year and I'm ready for something new.

But I really am going to miss parts of it. I'm going to be sad to say good-bye to some dear women who have invited me into their homes and fed me cakes, cookies or other various goodies. I'm going to be sad to say good-bye to some families that have welcomed me into their homes and treated me as a daughter or granddaughter (depending on their ages). I'm going to be sad to say good-bye to the local pastors as they have become my colleagues and friends.

10 days left. And I'm working on making plans to have each day full of various events. Including a potluck tonight, helping to set up VBS table decorations tomorrow, packing on Saturday, preaching and leading worship on Sunday morning (first time flying solo!), going to a county fair in Bagley Sun afternoon, VBS during the evenings Mon-Thurs, going out to eat with the local pastors for Tues lunch, picking up Mariko (college roomie) Tues night, going to Canada on Friday, Relay for Life on Sat 14th, preaching and enjoying a potluck in my honor Sun 15th, moving to St Paul on the 16th, taking Mariko to the bus depot then driving to SD on the 17th, chauffeuring Krissa around the 18-20th. And that is all that I know for sure. There will be more activities that are likely going to fit in as people are really coming to realize that I'm leaving soon.

But here is something I decided to include in my blog. I've never posted any of my newsletter articles on the blog, but I decided to include my final one that I wrote for this month's church newsletter.

Kara’s Last Words (at least in the Beacon…)

Wow. My time is coming to a close. I can hardly believe that I’m writing what will be my last newsletter article for the Beacon. I’m suffering a little shock that my 11 ½ months are almost over. My last Sunday (Aug 15) is but days away…

People keep asking me how I feel about internship ending. I always respond that it’s both good and bad.

Good because I’m ready for the next stage in my life. Ready to go back to school and have some time to reflect upon my experiences. Ready to see my fellow interns again. I may not be ready to sit in lectures and write papers, but I suppose that comes with the territory of being a student.

But bad because there are some people and activities I’m going to miss. I am going to miss Bible studies (whether on Tues afternoon, Wed morning or Thurs evening). I’m going to miss quilting, helping out at the Food Shelf and Soup Kitchen, and delivering Meals on Wheels. I’m going to miss Kid’s Club, Confirmation and youth group. I’m going to miss visiting with people I’ve come to know over the course of my time, whether at church, in homes or during chance meetings around town. There were some activities I did not get to start and/or finish (like ice fishing and curling). And those are just some off the top of my head.

I have been blessed with being able to say that I’ve learned a lot this year. It has been a rough year with a lot of space to learn and grow. I’m not going to lie and say that it was always peachy, but I will say that I appreciate just how much I have learned.

There were some true high points of working with Bethel-ites (pretty sure I just made up a word to name the people from Bethel Lutheran). I loved being able to talk and pray with people, to worship God as a community, to serve the community, and to spend some fun times playing games (like cricket on the lawn).

But there were also times when I struggled with writing sermons, preparing Bible studies, visiting with people, leading worship, etc. I’ve had a few bouts of being too sick and tired to do anything besides sleep (usually due to overextending myself so that I would come down with some virus).

But all of those challenges have helped to strengthen me both as a person of faith and as a future minister. I’ve had to learn (or re-learn) how to set up boundaries, recognize when I need to rest, and give all my worries over to God. I’ve been humbled and chastised at times, but I also have become much stronger in my personal faith and trust in God through the challenges.

Thank you for walking with me on this part of my journey.

Blessings and Peace to you all

Intern Kara Wiechmann

in a fog

literally. i'm in a fog.

i'm looking outside my window (while breaking from planning vbs and putting the library books back) and through the haze of fog can make out the trees on the other side of the parking lot.

it was not fun to wake up to a foggy morning.

i purposely picked out which of the three bedrooms to sleep in (did i mention that my apartment/duplex is a three-bedroom?) because i would get the morning sun. and i know i get up faster when i have sunlight pouring down on me and disturbing my rest.

even if the room is the same side as the street. which means people drive by and make noise.

like the drag racers last week. seriously, two idiots were drag racing down my street. fortunately i live near the start line.

or the like the construction workers. cause the road is currently being worked on. and some days they start at 7 am. which is ridiculously early to be hearing the beep, beep, beep of the big beasts as they back up. or to have them going at the cement with jackhammers.

but i digress. part of the issue is the fact that there was no sun this morning. not that i ever see the sun actually peek over the horizon (stupid trees...), but i do notice a distinct change in lighting by 7:30 am.

so i started my morning sluggishly. got up after sleeping through alarms. ate breakfast. got dressed. went to work.

but now i have an amazing headache that is growing. i know it's part stress, part weather. stress because i have two weeks before i move. and a lot to do then. so much that it's hard to know exactly where to start. weather because i'm a human barometer who notices major changes. like from yesterdays sunny, partly cloudy weather to today's dreary fog. my head can feel it. and the brain is definitely slow and understanding is foggy this morning.

so i'm in a fog. or in fogs, as the case may be. i'm just hopin and prayin that the fog(s) will clear up...

skunk in my bucket

actually, there's not a skunk anywhere near me. especially not in a bucket, let alone my bucket. in fact, i don't think i even own a bucket...

but the smell of skunk currently permeates my office. 

allow me to explain. 

dick heard a his ruckus in garage last night. when he went to get in his pickup and leave this morning, he met the culprit. 

now, i don't care how cute skunks look with their black and white stripes and cute noses. they stink to high heaven and back (which happens to be an antiquated saying i've heard quite often this year).

so poor dick reeks. and i hear his garage is far worse and not likely to smell better any time soon. so when he walked into the church building today, he brought the stink with him. and sadly enough, stinks don't usually just travel with one person, so that when the person leaves the smell leaves. the smell lingers.

so the smell of skunk lingers in my office.

and there are no windows that can be opened at church, so it shall linger for quite some time...

Pictures!!!!!!!

As promised (now that I broke down and bought an SD card reader since my laptop's built-in one decided to stop working last week), here are some pictures:

Bethel Lutheran with Roddy at TeenServe

Crew #58 with Melissa and Granny

Alpine Coaster in Duluth, MN

Carley and I in a paddleboat on a lake in WI

From my old to my new living room...

Mount Carmel 

Sunset on Lake Carlos

Sunrise on July 13

Sunrise on July 16

Most intense slip n slide

My gruesome bug bite (it looked worse in person)

A beaver in Bemidji

ugh

it's amazing how one syllable can sum up your entire mood.

and "ugh" fits me to a t right now. 

allow me to elaborate a bit. this week just never seems to end. it's flown by because i've been so busy, but right now i'm so drained...

i finished monday with over two hours of cleaning. that's right. i cleaned with an arm that had a swollen bug bit approximately the size of my hand...i have a picture to prove it. and if i remember, i'll even post it to gross people out. won't be today, but i may go back and add or edit in the next couple days. 

i'm on antibiotics...boo...first prescription in my life. seriously. mom couldn't think of any. other than glasses or contacts, and those really don't count. so now, in addition to a crazy schedule, i have to remember to take a pill three times a day. easier said than done. 

my tuesday was uber long. i got to the church at 8:45 am. which is pretty good for me since i don't have anything going on until 10:30, which is when the pastor's text study starts. was with them until noon, when i quickly grabbed lunch, talked to my sister kayla, and finalized prep for a bible study at 1:30. did that, ate a snack with them, then retreated back to my batcave, aka my desk. where i proceeded to finalize (which really meant neatly rewriting out my notes) the bible study for wednesday morning. since i was going to be gone for it. then chatted with someone a bit when i was walking out of the church. and left at 6:30 pm. which is a long time to be in a church building without stepping outside once. went home and packed for my overnight trip to come. 

got up wednesday morning, picked up a parishioner, and drove to rochester, mn. which is a good 5.5 hrs away in good traffic. which we did not have. for those of you who don't know, there is about an 8-10 mile stretch on east-bound I-94 into the twin cities that is basically stop and go traffic. not fun. but we made it to the hotel and hopped on a shuttle to go to mayo (i'm healthy but she needed to consult with a surgeon there). so now i can say that i've been to mayo. we ate at famous dave's where they serve way too much food. then i watched some tv before crawling into bed. only to wake up 1.5 hrs later when i got a text message from my baby sister...before crawling back under the covers.

alarm went off at 5:15. i slept until 5:50 (i wasn't going anywhere...) when i woke up again to say a quick bye to the church member (we shared a room) and run out into the rain to get something out of my car. back to bed. woke up, packed my bags, watched some tv waiting for the phone call to pick her up at the clinic. and started the drive back. 

highlight today: ikea! 

she had never been, so we stopped by for the experience. i ate some food and bought some things. it was glorious. then we got back in the car and drove the 4 hrs to bemidji. 

and now i'm sitting in the batcave waiting for a meeting to start. i need to be at a meeting at 7, but i'm so tired and feel as though i'm going to fall asleep before it's over. 

i'm even too tired to get really worked up after reading my internship committee's evaluation of me.

but i can sum it up: i'm too immature, casual and inexperienced to be a parish pastor. oh, and my sermons lack depth (which they define as real-life illustrations) and have not been prepared well enough in advance, and i must admit that they are thinking of my past habits when i started sermon prep on fridays, but the last four months i could generally tell them what my sermon was about on tuesdays...i guess finally learning some discretion about work habits bit me in the behind. again. oh, and another bonus in my committee having the guts to bring up the fact that where i stand in relation to the elca's decision on homosexuality causes them concern. 

but i do have enough fight in me to make one comment: big shocker that you think the 25-year-old is young, casual and lacks experience right now to be an effective parish pastor. even bigger shocker is knowing that my pastoral style would be a great fit for a younger congregation. at least in comparison to them. since most of the congregation, and my committee in particular, are old enough to be grandparents or great-grandparents (seriously, all five are older than my parents, who are already grandparents) and having pastors that have all been on the other side of 30...generally much father down the road on the other side of 30...and as far as my stance in the elca, i would like to point out that this congregation has half the members it did a year ago, and all those who left/are leaving stand exactly where i am. way to kick them (and me) out the door.

oh, and did i happen to mention that my congregation is a known clergy-killer? as in, they drive off their clergy every 5-7 years...and this is the current pastor's 7th year...

so that's my week. and i have to somehow have enough energy to finalize a sermon for sunday in this emotional state...

ugh.